Soaring high, all over the blue sky
in an effortless flight, much like
a free flowing pour.
Of imagination. Creativity.
All of it and much more.
And then an image,
is juxtaposed –
a burdened flight
choked with grandiose
and flowery seams.
Restrained and redeemed.
Commanding almost, a certain
response.
Set in it’s ways
and not free to be owned.
Creative block
a carefree thought
taking it’s time to turnout.
Are we too quick to decide?
Or, are these things bound to die?
That initial spark with a promise to last,
where does that go? When everyday gets a hold?
or, is the mundane the beauty it boasts?
When other things become important
and you’re just waiting to get a hold
doesn’t it shrivel and die?
The happiness you thought you’d forever have
will it really be?
Or, is it a mirage, like the oasis
on a heated patch of land?
Maybe, forever is just a hoax –
what you have now is all you have.
I wonder,
doesn’t it shrivel and die?
When there’s nothing to hide?
When there’s no mystery, no facade
and all the risks are analysed before time?
Where does it all go – that charm,
that getting lost, and
not looking so alarmed?
Maybe, it’s the everyday catching on,
causing it to normalise.
The forever stays forever, a term
set in future, with no seal, date or time –
a foolish trick we all live by.
Everyday catches on,
Replacing the spark with a flame
Endurance. Patience. No complains.
Four years. Yes, four.
That’s how long it’s been.
An escape. A safe haven. A place to grow.
Simple. Clean. My space, you know?
Four years of writing
Of sharing my all
Just a silly click and it’s all gone
Well, not gone per se
Just the face of it
The clean, easy-going charm of it
New things are to happen to it now
A growing I guess in a new way
At first, I thought it was irreversible
An identity lost with a four-year cost
It’s not that bad, it’s just a ‘moving on’
To better things, to newer skins
The consumer in me trying to justify it
Leaving old sights and feels behind
That’s what the system says
Not that bad, just a moving on, to a
Bigger. Brighter. Better face.
Say cheese and welcome the change babe!
I say I see all sides.
The blacks and whites, the greys behind
Do I really? I’m in a bind
There are days I hate some
There are days I love them
What is it that I love-hate?
Them or what they see?
Or are we all that we see?
Will I ever be fine with all the shades?
The blacks and whites and the greys?
I thought I see all sides
Facets, facades, and flights
Am I too lost in mine?
To take what comes With no-bind?
Today I love
Day after I hate
Is there a balance I’m trying to find?
And like always
I say I see all sides
The blacks and whites, the greys behind
In a crowd, on her own
Liking her own company
Not much of a social butterfly
But one that likes fantasies
Being on her own, very quiet
Not challenging any benchmark,
titles, if any. Life of an extroverted
Introvert. Yes, you’re reading titbits
Of how it feels. Reaching the outside
To recharge, make meaning if any
Hiding back in when overwhelmed
Maintains a dairy. Talks to herself.
Stays indoors for days. Finds the sun
To warm up and get rid of the haze.
Dresses up, waltz around
Feeling very pretty!
Scared of all the divas, politicians too
Socialising? Doesn’t understand much.
Simple thought simple living
Live and let live and keep it spinning
Extroverted Introvert.
Not challenging. Not laughing.
In a crowd, on her own
Liking her own company
Baby, come back to me Remember me. Baby, come back to me Remember me Fresh out of a black and white Movie on just one screen My eyes. I see. I see you. Baby, come back to me Detached. Alone. Wise. Very bold. Hidden. Broken too. Hidden. Independent. Still hidden. Remember me Let's set the scene You and me, what could've been a space of our own unknown to all known Still playing on the movie screen Remember me I hope you don't hide too long Baby, come back to me It kills me to see you leave We're meant to be Don't you realise what you meant to me? It isn't a mystery
Eyes. We look at so many. There are brief encounters Some are deep and steady. For a while to eventually break off every set has a story to say, I'm busy, talk to me, I'm closed So much more. Finding that one pair that is home It takes a while. Eyes. Windows to the souls. Unwavering. True. Deep. Should someone let you see See and not look. Read. Eyes, they're windows to the soul. I've seen a pair. Beautiful brown Warm and there, there for me. Let's me in, into the soul it carries And reads right back. It's endearing. It is a window to the child within That I know Past the glaze of all it has seen Lies a purity, an innocence Clouded by words, hidden by tones A 'fitting the world' one does My pair, my window To innocence. To happyness. No facade. Let's me see both ways Them and right back. Beautiful brown. I've found them. Eyes. We look at so many.
Not so long ago there I was, trying, too hard to fit in, to be someone I clearly was not in a land far, far away with a bundle on my head too heavy to carry of worries of this world of making it work all alone, to only know later that I was on my own Scary Scary is the word that falls off of my lips when I think of it Not so long ago there I was, trying, too hard to fit in, to be someone I clearly was not too little to know too little to understand yet I had a bold facade I would smile I would nod I would act like someone I was not growing up, too fast to fit in, in a world that wouldn't let one fit in. There I was in a land far, far away with a bundle on my head too heavy to carry of worries of this world of making it work all alone, to only know later that I was on my own.
Let go she said to herself Let go of all the worries There's a little bird called Faith Let her hop in and show you the way Walk around the garden of nowness It's beautiful. Take in all that you see. Deep breaths. Let go little girlie, too much, you've put on your head. Smile. Close your eyes. Take a deep breath in. This is life. Let Faith show you around There's a lot to see. 💚
There is a thing I want to write about. Write to explore, the uneasy feeling building up, every two days or more. It's like there's no air and there's this old-ish smell, hanging, mourning the loss of something that's slowly losing care. I cannot pin point on what it is, however, it is bothersome. Maybe, it is a state of mind, or maybe it is more. There is a something I want to write about, waiting for it to be clear.
